Retirement at 32?

I am indeed retiring at the age of 32. I will no longer ski as an "athlete" under the logo of any company. I am having a hard time calling it retirement, per say, because I am building on that skill set to pursue more time guiding projects, behind the lenses, and on typing away on computer screens as a content creator for Telemark Skier Magazine, as well as Vertical Integration, and freelancing. However, as I sat through a meeting with my insurance guy who has been trying to keep my life insured for years despite numerous rejections and "ski" clauses he asked me the question. "So what do I put this down as now? Retired?" My slow and awkwardly long silence before replying must have given away my apprehension. He looked up from his computer and smiled as he waited for my verbal confirmation. "Yeah... I guess so." Up until that point I really hadn't said it out loud to anyone other then my wife. 

You see, we just had our first child, a son. His name is Amos, and as I left the house in to go to Japan last winter my wife gave me the news as I zipped up my gear bag. For the last couple of seasons I had felt myself beginning to lose my "edge" a little. I had to live my life on what I once heard best called, "the verge". My friend Paul Kimbrough said it to me once, and it made a lot of sense. In this game we have to be right on the verge of loosing it, but still having just enough control. My whole life was like that to a certain extent, and as I aged I could feel myself loosing a bit of that edge needed to operate on the verge. Now with a new son, my tolerance for risk has moved back a little more yet again. I am blessed to be able to continue my life on snow with new skill sets for creating content, and guiding projects, but I will never step up to something bigger then ever, or gnarlier then I have ever done. That is of course unless you consider parenthood. That is going huge. Just in a whole different way. I must say that it is a little weird to be retiring from something that has been the sole focus of my life for so many years, but at such a young age. Getting better was on my mind at all times. Still is, but now I have changed the goal. Thankfully, my previous goals have paved the road to my new ones. I must say that for me this has been an interestingly awkward and strange experience. It is surprisingly difficult to slow down for someone who has always lived at full throttle, but I am... a little. I will still be the same man I have always been, and by most's definition I will still take risks beyond their tolerance. However, for me, it will be a step back. It is like going from 120mph on the interstate to 95mph, which is still too fast for most, including the cops, but if your someone who has been going 120mph for a long time, then 95 feels pretty slow. I can say one thing for sure though, it has been one hell of a ride at 120mph for all those years.
As I have the strangely fortunate experience of contemplating a career at such a young age, I cannot help but be nostalgic about all of it. So much has brought me to where I am. So much. From the memorial ink on my shoulders that has reminded me every morning in the mirror of my blessed life that I am indeed so. So much. The inspiration and lessons they gave me will always be there in my reflection and in my heart to remind me to appreciate every last bit of it. From chasing dreams across the tops of mountain peaks to now raising a family within that inspiration. The lessons of my father, my mother, and their own, are now mine. Many have given me chances, opportunities and wisdom along the way. I am so grateful for all of it, and all of them. I am amidst a life change. I am happy that I am able to have at least enough wisdom to know just how fortunate I have been on the whole wild ride. I will never report another 100 foot cliff huck, by me at least, on this website ever again. That being said, I will be still be sharing my adventures guiding ambitious rippers to those kinds of goods. I will still be traveling the globe chasing powder, projects, and all kinds of good stories from everywhere I can find them. I have come to realize that I am a story teller, be it over a cold beer on a back porch, a feature article in the pages of some magazine, this website, or a chair lift. I will always be going for it just a bit too fast, and a bit too hard, and telling the stories I come across while doing so. I hope my son can appreciate that... and maybe even be a little inspired by it.